Mateo
Mateo is a Paris-era contact from the queer after-party scene who appears in the journal across 2020 and 2021. He is not a central figure but recurs at moments of transition.
Role in the Paris scene
Mateo appears as a social peer from the Paris queer and after-party environment. The record places him near Steven during periods of heavy substance use, late-night conversation, and social drift. He is present enough to function as a reference point, but not enough to become a central relationship.
Lockdown period
An April 2020 journal entry describes an evening during the COVID lockdown:
“Mateo et moi étions dans le salon en train de boire un verre de vin, prendre une trace de K et refaire le monde. Je fouillais dans mes photos pour chercher qch quand je suis tombé sur cette photo du nouvel an 2014. KERNEL PANIC.”
The 2014 photo is not identified. The reaction, written in capitals as “KERNEL PANIC,” shows that it disrupted Steven enough to stop the evening and become its own documented moment.
After Arthur
The journal entry written immediately after the Arthur breakup names Mateo alongside Arthur as a behavioral model Steven is rejecting:
“Ça ne se fera pas à la façon de Mateo, pas celle d’Arthur, ni celle imposée par la société non. À ma façon.”
This suggests Mateo had offered advice, a behavioral framework, or an implicit model of how to handle the situation. Steven marked it as something to move away from.
June 2021
A June 2021 entry, written during the post-Arthur transition period in Paris, says:
“J’ai également voulu refaire un pas en avant déguisé, qui m’est très rapidement revenu dans la tête. Bonsoir Matéo. Tu n’as fait que confirmer ce qui s’était construit en moi tout ce temps. Faible.”
The context suggests a contact attempt, possibly from Mateo or by Steven toward Mateo. Steven ends by calling Mateo “Faible.” The tone is recognition rather than anger. Something Mateo did confirmed a judgment Steven had been forming for some time.
Profile
Mateo’s background is not documented beyond these appearances. He is present during lockdown 2020, peripheral during the Arthur era, and absent from the record by mid-2021.